"The Patton Chronicle"

Vol. II: No. 5

Editor: Tom Sullivan (a deadbeat with a deadline) ( ... for dead lines )

good for--

*sniffles

*sneezes

*snorts

*runny noses

(guaranteed 14 times the wet strength of George Wendler's paper--his is Water Logged, you know)

good for--

*coughs

*double pneumonia

*spills

*stains

LINES WRITTEN DURING A MEDITATION UPON A STARTING BLOCK A FEW SECONDS BEFORE THE STARTER SHOT THE GUN OFF--AND BLEW MY BRAINS OUT...ADROITLY....

"There once was a coach from Planet Tut,
Referred to by most as a 'nut.'
He was one to eschew,
For when he sniffed glue,
Instead of "hic" he went "hut!"

-1-

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