"The Patton Chronicle"

Vol. II: No. 5

Editor: Tom Sullivan (a deadbeat with a deadline) ( ... for dead lines )

good for--

*sniffles

*sneezes

*snorts

*runny noses

(guaranteed 14 times the wet strength of George Wendler's paper--his is Water Logged, you know)

good for--

*coughs

*double pneumonia

*spills

*stains

LINES WRITTEN DURING A MEDITATION UPON A STARTING BLOCK A FEW SECONDS BEFORE THE STARTER SHOT THE GUN OFF--AND BLEW MY BRAINS OUT...ADROITLY....

"There once was a coach from Planet Tut,

Referred to by most as a 'nut.'

He was one to eschew,

For when he sniffed glue,

Instead of "hic" he went "hut!"

-1-

Next Page * Foam-Fare Index * Home Page