Flotsam & Jetsam: Hauck's latest push in the field of water polo is something called the Annual Water Polo Banquet to be held May 2. The affair promises to be big and bold and, best of all, free. His choice of speakers includes nat'l and state champions, most of whom are members of that famous club which meets at the "First and Last" after the polo games on Sunday. This alone should indicate some pretty fluid if not fluent speeches. After the free breakfast and the speeches, an exhibition game will be held between the unscathed youth of Patton and the aged bottom-dwellers from the shallow end. It is the old conflict of good vs. evil. Something tells me this game will be decided on refereeing..........Patton girls won a dual meet against Ann Arbor (52-44). Looking impressive in the meet was Joanie Makkonen, 59.2 for the 100 free. Joanie also had a 2:12.4 200 free and a 4:48.8 400 free in practice the other day. Other good workout times are Mark Manrique, 1:09.5 100 breast; Janie Johnson, 2:53 200 br. and Joanne Scarborough, 4:47 400 free.........the day after the polo banquet, Hauck's award banquet takes place (May 3). (Hearken all ye food mongers) My brother-in-law suggested we follow the same menu as was used for the Halloween meal at Purdue University: SOUP: Crime of Tomato--Clammy Chowder; APPETIZERS: Horror d’oeuvres, Brains on Half Shell, Fruited Corpse Werewolf; SALAD: Pickled Bats-- Caesar Borgia with Nitric Acid Dressing, Tossed Torso; ENTREE: Scare-Rib with Arty- Chokes, Ghoulash with Hearse-Radish, Limbs-Chopped Grille, Peasant under Glass (in season), Vampire Soufflé, Cadaver Barbecue; VEGETABLES: Potatoes Guillotine, Bloody Beets, Charred Swiss, French Flies; DESSERTS: Ladies' Fingers (fresh cut), Pie a la Morgue, Creepy Suzettes, Shocklit Sundae; BEVERAGE: Coffin with Cream, Ghost Mil., Grave Juice. This way, if the guests die, it won't be from boredom.........."Big Daddy" Gilbert came forth this week from Indiana University. He had a 48.9 100 free on the Ind. frosh Nat'l record free relay a while ago, but he didn't seem too proud of it. Guess that caliber of swimming and environment raises your values. John Wescott and Monty Blashill came in to town too. John is still around and is speculating on reviving his all too short career, but Monty departed after infecting the girls' team with measles, which he himself contracted two days after arriving. MBC missed her Jr. Nat'l 200 fly and one girl's meet after coming down with the disease for the second time; Joanie Makkonen has them now; and Janie Johnson has, as yet, only a measly case of measles......... MBC was sorely missed at the Garden City AAU meet which Patton lost by 1/6th of a point. Outstanding performance at this meet for Patton was J. Scarborough's 200 breast in 2:43...........Congratulations to NWAC and Ron Alsobrook for winning the Wyandotte 16 & under boys championships--Patton rooters second choice all the way. Our most promising performer in that one was Mark Manrique, 2:15.6 200 I.M..... ...the girls 16 under championships, sponsored by the "Golden Lions." went off smoothly, with none of the "dawn to dusk" characteristics of many AAU meets. Relatively short prelims. and still briefer finals added greatly to the spectator interest of the meet, and the many fine performances were amply recognized by the crowd. Frank Legacki's Ann Arbor squad (including a menagerie of mascots from sacred cows to red-haired gnomes) took second place in the championships with 57 1/2 points, while "Golden Lion" swimmer Sue Stuckey had an outstanding performance of 57.8 in the 100 free. Considering that of the 14 events in the meet many girls were swimming 5 of them, the times were especially fine. Patton girls, through inspiration, aspiration, and perspiration, took the championships, scoring 125 1/2 points. Almost every Patton girl did her best time for at least one race and many of them bettered 4 or 5 races, but the outstanding performance was probably Joanie Makkonen's state record of 2:28.5 in the 200 I.M. Looking promising was Mary Lou Shefsky (just turned 13), 1:11.9 100 back and 2:36.4 200 IM........Well, the state high school 400 is in the record books now, as expected. It was a race for the record in more ways than one, as it see-sawed back and forth in the closing laps. End result: Doug Webster by an arm over Pete Adams, 3:56.8 to 3:57.2