because my gold supply is looking kinda sparse. See you Christmas, Bullwhip (Gary Cooke, Univ. S. Carolina)

Bullwhip--I can hear your talent "soundin'" from way up here. You should write scripts for "Maverick." You've got that Bret Maverick cynicism. The Crap Island boat sank last week when Szumski (Bullwinkle) boarded her. Bullwinkle sends that they don't have any food--ISU. I asked him about his roomie, and he said in his drawling, smiling way: "I'll eat that little twerp if they don't start feedin' me soon." He don't look hungry. Could even pass for a lighthouse in the Crap Island Harbor.

Flotsam & Jetsam: Looks like the Christmas meet may have electric timers this year...and electrifying times, as well; entries are coming from formidable competition as far away as Florida ..... Mr. Richards is in the hospital (Mt. Carmel) for an operation. That birthday party the gang threw for me at his house must have been too much! What with exploding pens, MaryLou "Dancin' fool" Shefsky, and the last of the Marx bros.--Brian Bates. Last year I was on a hot dog binge, and the team gave me a gigantic sausage (complete with candles) this year apples were my main subsistence, and apples it was--in a silver trough, each with a candle. Other gifts included an attaché case, address book, and some "Tigershark monogrammed" underwear. I'll wear the attaché case with pride--bless you ................. Pat Ennis came out of hiding for the Battle Creek meet (Pat's now done a 53.8 100); they had a sign there that said "Welcome Swimmers" (Pat thought it said "Welcome Sinners"). After the meet, King Arthur Church, Ennis, Gi-Gi Gottschling, Bill "Swissteak" Swistak and I wound up in a "cake-eaters" restaurant way over our heads on the tab. Swiss took one look at the cutlery and retreated to a beanery. Ennis filled up on bread-sticks and after using the napkin commented: "I feel like I'm wiping my mouth with a table-cloth." ...................... Leading off the top time this month: a NAT'L RECORD for our boys 13-14 400 MED. REL. 4:05.0 (splits: GREG PENN 1:02.7, BILL BEISER 1:06.9, GARY GOTTSCHILLING 1:00.4, DAVE KEE 54.9); Jo Scarborough 2:09.7 200 free; Doug Webster 1:47.5 200 free; 2:06.9 200 IM; Bill Beiser (14) 1:06.8 100 breast; Greg "Dino": Penn (14) 2:01.7 200 free, 55.0 100, 1:11.0 100 breast; Jim "Secret Squirrel" Teunas (14) 2:03.2 200 free, 1:03.5 100 fly, 2:22.1 200 fly; Pat Holcomb (14) 1:15.6 100 breast; Barb Church (13) 1:09.7 100 back; Holly Hubbard (14) 1:14.0 100 back; Irene Silva (12) 50 fly 31.0; Karen Hislop (10) 3:06 200 IM; Jim Klemanski 2:34 200 breast; Gary Gottschling 2:17.8 200 IM, 26.7 50 fly; Cathy Stidwell 59.6 100 free, 1:17.8 100 breast, 1:11.3 100 fly; Sharon Hancock 2:13.9 200 free, 2:36 200 IM; John Klemanski (13) 2:43 200 br. , 1:15 100 breast; Randy Penn (11) 1:09.0 100 free; John Szuba (13) 1:07.5 100 back; Tom Szuba 31.0 50 fly, 1:03.4 100 free; Abdul 1:03 100 fly, 2:19.8 200 fly; Ralph Richards 2:22.1 200 fly; Brian Bates 1:12.4 100 br.; and many, many more. Looking formidable in workouts, are the following. Watch out for them in next month's FF: M.B. Ceresko, Carol Merry, Steve Waszak, Alice Ceresko, Bob Rienas, Debbie Hislop. They are the ones whose workout times are way ahead of their meet times. Wait and see! ................... Pete Adams is coming home for Christmas. Pete who is a "Hah-vahd" man will stir a happy tear or two in his teammates eyes when he arrives ................... Bruce Norvell phoned from Ohio the other night. He's working out, too ................. Ed Picard is ready for another big drop, like last year's. Ed and I went to the United Artist's theater the other night. The screen was so far from the projector, the projectionist got a medal for marksmanship .......................... Jo Scarborough is gaining on Mark Manrique with 5 more stitches after crashing into the wall on a flip-turn. The new floating white canes come out in March ........................ Cathy Stidwell churned off a 1:34 150 free in practice. One second ahead of Joanne's split on the way to the 2:09.7. Joanne had a blazing finish, however, and we've yet to see that last 50 of Cathy's. Remember girls, I'll swim a mile free if you hit 2:07. MBC, who gets lost this time of the year and then breaks loose, could be within range also, with her 2:11.0 last March. In addition to the other rash bets I made, I'll swim a mile of the respective strokes if the following are accomplished: Bill Beiser 2:24 200 breast before you turn 15 or a Nat'l record in the 100. Greg Penn 1:58.0 200 free before you turn. Barb Church 2:27.5 200 back. Irene Silva Nat'l record 100 fly. Gary Gottschling 2:13.5 200 fly, 2:09.9 200 back.

Here are some more fragments of meet schedules (wish mine was as good as R. DeVore's in Columbus, Ohio):

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